Some of the Worst-Best-of-Lists We’ve Seen

So you’re a online content creator, say, for example, you’re me. Or you’re Buzzfeed, or CNN.com (oh did you think CNN.com was real news?), or for the sporting fans maybe a Deadspin or BleacherReport–I stopped linking these clickbait sites because you get the point already. So lets say you want to get as many views to your page as possible, actual content be damned, setting up lists of trending topics and filled with high search velocity keywords seems like a good route to take, right? Next time you click through a 38 page slideshow of Hottest Teen Celebrities, consider that your clicks are being monetized, and hey, maybe you want to keep scrolling through those hot teen celebs, I don’t blame you at all. So in the vein of snarkily mocking other blogs, here are some of the worst Best of Lists floating around on the internet.

(in order to protect the sites of the innocent, and to not get angry emails, the list titles have been paraphrased and not linked!)

Arbitrary Number of Internet Memes that are Washed-up and Need to Go Away

crooked manners doge sun

This one is a classic, because the site gets to link itself to a bunch of incredibly popular internet searches like Rickroll, “Y U NO,” “erhmagerd,” Doge stuff, Rage Comics (the ones that always end in FUUUUU), and so on and so forth. You know ’em, you love ’em, and apparently the best way to make them go away is to produce more content hyping these things that need to go away. Frankly, as a professional internetter, I love memes, I love Doges, can still appreciate a good Rickrolling.

Top Goatse Related Photoshopscrookedmanners wtf picture

If you were lucky enough to see goatse during your formative years, you know its not something that needs to be parodied or photoshopped..ever.

Top Things Never to do in the Nude

Most of the “things never to do while nude” on the list will land you in jail, or physically scar you permanently. For instance, don’t get 3rd degree burns on your naked flesh and don’t do things around children in the nude. Really one of the dumbest lists of all time–however they got to put in tons of tastefully-nude or semi-nude pictures on the slideshow of however many things–and people do love looking at naked people. Just watch a little HBO.
applenude
Arbitrary # of Ways to Lose Weight (Find a soulmate or Make a lot of money)

If these worked, their secrets wouldn’t be shared for free on www.creedthoughts.gov.www\creedthoughts. This is just run of the mill predatory advertising to dumb people. I mean, smart people like us have never clicked on those things before…
trainers-hate-him
 

Welp theres my list of lists, got a nude woman in there, some internet memes, puts on shades time to jet ski outta here.

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